I’m in Singapore right now, I don’t know what it is but I always find Singapore kind of boring, and with todays weak pound it’s getting very expensive, I paid 4 quid for a can of beer and a packet of crisps yesterday, not too bad you say, but this wasn’t from a bar, this was from the local 7-Eleven (no mini bar in my room).

Anyway, the hotel is located well, at Clarke Quay, but again, not cheap, it’s costing around 150 quid a night and is very average, there’s a dvd player in the room which is a nice touch but it’s got the smallest TV I’ve ever seen in a hotel room in Asia, it’s like a computer monitor, I don’t know what they were thinking.

Another thing about Singapore, whenever I’m ill on a business trip it seems to be in Singapore, this time I’ve got man-flu, another time I was on the way back from India and had eaten, as a doctor put it “food contaminated with faeces”, I did lose about 5kg though, so swings and roundabouts really innit, etc etc.

Anyway, that’s enough moaning for today, so let me tell you a story (well, more of an anecdote) of something that happened a long long time ago (well, ok, about 10 years ago).

When I lived in Blackpool I used to knock around with the punks (was at uni with one of them), still see them when I go back for christmas etc. Anyway, my mate from uni, who we shall call “Dave” was getting married and we went out in Blackpool for the stag night.

There was a mix of punks and uni mates and we had a cracking night round blackpool clashing with various hen nights in the Counting House and places I’ve forgotten. Anyway, time was getting on and the stag was requesting lap dancing so off we went to find a lap dancing bar. Someone spotted one and we joined the long queue and messed around as we waited (as punks and students do). We’d waited for a while when one of the guys pointed out that the people in front of us were an old couple, we were all in fits of laughter at the pervy old couple, we spotted a few others too but didn’t really think much of it.

After 20 minutes or so we got to the door, “you’re not coming in here lads” said the guy on the door, an argument started but they wouldn’t change their mind “its ok, he’s drunk but we’ll look after him” etc etc, until one of the lads said “err lads, come on let’s go, now”, we were confused but walked away, as we walked he said “have another look at the sign”, we turned round and looked at the large neon sign above the door. “LINE DANCING” it said.